S2 | E6 Rose Wippich — Midlife isn’t a Curse it’s your Second Chance

Midlife can feel like you’re just going through the motions—working, doing chores, taking care of everyone, then doing it all again the next day.

In this episode, Lara talks with Rose Wippich about what it looked like for her to make big changes in midlife.

After a breast cancer diagnosis at 49, Rose started looking at her life differently. She left a career she no longer enjoyed, started yoga teacher training at 55, stopped drinking, and began making more time for herself.

In this conversation, they talk about:
✨ making time for yourself, even in small ways
✨ learning to say no without guilt
✨ life after alcohol
✨ how Qigong helps you slow down and reset

If you’ve been feeling tired, stuck, or like you’ve put yourself last for too long, this episode is for you.

Get to know more about Rose: https://www.rosewippich.com

If you have loved today’s episode, please share this with a friend. ❤️

About Lara Portelli:

As a successful business owner, NLP Practitioner, Midlife Reset Mentor, acclaimed award-winning author, and seasoned professional, Lara understands the challenges of navigating careers, business, and personal growth. She now channels her expertise into mentoring women through midlife and into their bodacious second act, helping ambitious women step into their power and build success on their own terms.

Connect with Lara: https://www.laraportelli.com/

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Okay, mid-like and mark and like 3K. We don't have any second act. It's quite uncomfortable. We're talking dead okay. We're talking menopause, divorce, reinvention, and everything in between. Because this isn't your mother's midlife crisis. This is midlife unplugged. Welcome back, everybody, to Midlife Unplugged the Fucker Is. I'm your host, Lara Portelli, and today our guest is Rose Whippage, all the way from New Jersey in the USA, a long way from us here in Australia. Welcome, Rose. Welcome, welcome.

SPEAKER_01 0:47

Yeah, thank you, Lara.

SPEAKER_00 0:49

Yes, I can't wait to unpack your midlife journey. And as we uh as I've learnt from some of your um teachings and writings, that, you know, unfortunately some women think midlife is a bit of a curse or it's downhill, but there's women out there that are proving that wrong and that midlife is actually time to start again or a second act or time to find pieces of us that we thought were missing. Would you agree with that, Rose?

SPEAKER_01 1:18

Absolutely. I think it's the best act.

SPEAKER_00 1:20

Okay. So, Rose, tell us a little bit about you and then we'll get into a chat.

SPEAKER_01 1:25

All right. So uh so Rose Whipitch, I'm and like you said, I'm in New Jersey. I also have my own podcast called Chat Off the Mat. Uh, I just recently wrote a book or or launched a book called Empress Rising. It's about midlife and beyond embracing that life and and sovereignty and and um saying fuck it to everything except what you want to do. I love it. Uh I have twin boys as well in uh in college. I I became a mom late in life. And I feel that the best years were when I started really embracing what I wanted to do, and just things just started just changing and transforming in my life, and um that's why I'm here today.

SPEAKER_00 2:05

Amazing. So, Rose, I know some of your journey, and let's unpack that a little bit. So you were diagnosed with breast cancer, the same age as your mom.

SPEAKER_01 2:16

Uh yes, actually the same age as uh when my mom passed away.

SPEAKER_00 2:20

Passed away.

SPEAKER_01 2:21

Wow, that's yeah. So yeah, that that was a little scary. So she passed away at 49, and just shy of my 49th birthday, I was diagnosed with breast cancer, and I was like, oh my gosh, I just wanted to kind of get past that hurdle, right? So think about that age as about midlife, right? So big, big shocker at that time, at that point in my life. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 2:42

And how did you deal with that? What what drove you through that journey? What helped you to get through what was happening for you at that time in that part of your midlife?

SPEAKER_01 2:52

Well, I think the biggest thing is that my kids were seven years old, and and uh after that initial shock and saying, Oh my gosh, you know, why is this happening to me? I literally just kind of brushed myself off and said, you know, Rose, you've got a long life ahead of you, and you have a lot of things to do. I didn't know what those things were yet, besides raising my children, but I said, You have a lot of things to do in this life, so you got to get through this. And I did. And uh, I also was a Reiki master at the time, practicing Reiki on myself, mostly my family and myself. And I I think that that tool helped also helped me also to get through doing that energy work on myself and really felt that I can heal myself on some level during that whole process.

SPEAKER_00 3:36

Love it, love it. So you're come out the other side now, and were you always doing like I also like that you do Reiki, is it yoga and chagul?

SPEAKER_01 3:48

Yes, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:49

Some modalities. Can you help us for the the woman at home who's probably doing the differs now or picking up the toys off the floor at any time of the day or night? And let's talk to our audience and our women at home that you know may be thinking, oh, I just need some time for myself. What's something that I could put into my week that will work time-wise? Can you talk to us a little bit about because I don't I know people think um, you know, we all know about yoga, um, and probably a bit about yoga, uh, yoga yoga and sorry, Reiki. What's qigong?

SPEAKER_01 4:23

So qigong, I'm so glad you asked me that. Uh I love that. Uh so qigong, qi is energy, and gong means working with your energy. So um qigong is is movement, it's a movement practice that we can do standing and sitting. It depends if if you need to sit. And if you think about qigong, qigong is like the umbrella under which all martial arts is under, like kung fu, tai qi. If you've ever heard of tai chi, it's those movements that you see old people do in the park. Well, it's not for old people, it's for anybody, and it's great because it helps you to really connect with your energy and move stuck energy. So, think about like our lives, like we're we're so busy, we don't take care of ourselves, we're sitting all day, and our energy gets like just kind of sits there and it doesn't move around, and it blocks um our health. So, when we're moving our bodies in this very healthy way, we're moving that stagnation, and it really helps uh with benefiting the organs and your mood and your hormones and all that great stuff, so it's accessible to anybody, you don't need any special equipment, which I love as well, and it's really catching on, it's like the next yoga wave, which I I love.

SPEAKER_00 5:39

Okay, and have you always worked? So you talked about your fuck it moment at 49 and your true calling. And have you always worked in the in those modalities, or did you have a a life prior to 49 where um you were doing something that you didn't love? Because again, talking to our audience who's listening and the woman out there that's you know, am I going to be stuck in corporate? Am I yeah, and the other thing I can remember working in a job that paid the bills and I kind of liked it. But coming home and sometimes looking for an escape. So I'm interested to hear your version of did you always work in a job you loved? Or was it in your fuck at moment that you um that you said no, I'm going to stop doing what I don't love and do what I do love now? If that makes sense.

SPEAKER_01 6:34

So I did I did yes, absolutely. I did work in corporate for a long time and then got pregnant with my twins. And that had to stop, I had to stop working because then I had to be on bread bed bed rest. So when my kids were born and when they were little, I became a realtor. Now I hated that. So a realtor, I don't know if they call the same thing in in in Australia, but someone who sells houses and shows people houses, and we needed to have the extra income. So I did that. I hated it, I hated it, and I didn't want to do it, but I did, and I did it for 10 years. And after 10 years, that's when I said, you know what? Fuck this. I hate it. And that's when I became a yoga teacher. At 55, I went to 200-hour training with all these younger people, and I absolutely loved it. And I said, This is what I want to do. I always knew I wanted to teach others and inspire women. It was always about women because women, they're home taking care of the kids, it's chaotic every day. They don't know how to take care of themselves and carve time for themselves. And I wanted to just say, This is what you need to do, because I know for me personally, I had a yoga practice for years and it saved my life. It saved my sanity. So becoming a yoga teacher for me was so pivotal. And then a few years after that, I is when I started practicing Qigang. And I was like, oh my God, I love this too. So I just started to do what I felt I wanted to do and where I felt intuitively guided towards. And um, I love teaching people, I love, absolutely love it, and changing their lives. I changed their lives through through these practices.

SPEAKER_00 8:21

How did that make you feel at 55? I know you said doing the course, the 200-hour course with younger people. But how did it make you feel? You know, we talk about getting a hit of dopamine from exercise or whatever. You might some people like a wine, some people like different things. Did it make you feel scared? Um that's what I was getting at. Scared, but yet you still went on.

SPEAKER_01 8:47

Yes. Because I knew it was, yeah, it was I knew it was something I had to do. It was just like I knew that in my bones. But I was scared because it was a lot of information. I was 55 and I practiced all day long. I actually became probably in the best shape of my life at that time, wish I can go back. Uh, but it was scary getting in front of an audience and teaching. It's so different from when you sit on a mat and practice. So I felt like an imposter. I was like, who am I to do this? But I had been practicing for 25 years already. And I transformed, I did all this, you know, a lot of spiritual practice on myself. I had, trust me, I had a lot of fucking moments in my life, a lot of big changes I had to make in order to to find peace and really return to myself. But I stuck it out and I kept at it. And that's that was my journey, you know, part of part of what my journey had to be. And I I encourage women to, you know, if there's something that they know that they want to do, don't be afraid. Try it. What have you got to lose? Look at me. I gained so much just by helping others and and doing what I love.

SPEAKER_00 10:04

I love that. So again, for the woman that might be standing at the sink or getting the washing in, you know, this is your moment to put the washing basket down for a moment and you know, have have a listen to uh what Rose is saying. It's scary, but it's doable. It's doable. I know for myself. You know, um, I left a 25-year marriage four years ago and walked out with the clothes on my back. Did I know where I was going? Do I know what the next day was going to bring? Not at all. But it's having that, I like what you said about you knew in your bones. It's that intuition that you know you will be okay. We can't, it's not written out for us or mapped out, you know, for a woman with doing uh making a big change in her life. I've often heard people say too, there's no book for parenting. Well, there's no book when you're making big changes either, but there's this innate knowledge that everything will be okay, having that faith in what you're going to do, in your want to do, and also faith in yourself.

SPEAKER_01 11:07

That's I was gonna say the confidence and faith in yourself, right? No one's gonna do it for you. You have you want, you have to do it yourself. But I'm glad you mentioned again, listen to what lights you up. What lights you up? What is it that makes you feel really good and excited? And that's like a light shining on something that you may need to do. Look at all the things that you're doing in your life, right? Who knows? Who knew I was gonna be here talking to you, doing my own podcast, writing my own book? Didn't know it, but guess what? I did it's like you walk in one door and all these other doors open up for you.

SPEAKER_00 11:48

You're taking that step.

SPEAKER_01 11:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 11:50

So, Rose, when we're talking about these practices, what you know, in implementing a change, um, not every woman, of course, or husband out there uh needs to uh dissolve a marriage of 25 years, or you know, some people, there's other uh components that go with things when people make major life decisions. But if someone wanted to make some small changes in their daily routine or life, or say the the couple at home, the mum's been home all day with the children, what what advice piece of advice would you give the mum that's been home with a sick child, you know, day after day and not done anything for herself for let's just say months and months, being maybe a new mum or whatever someone's individual circumstances may be, what piece of advice would you have for implementing a change? Something like, okay, we we we're talking today about exercise, so we could keep along that vein, but what would you recommend?

SPEAKER_01 12:52

So I and I wish I had advice when I had my kids earlier in life, but it's really important to carve time out for yourself. That that whatever that is, and and it and it's almost like you're creating a boundary. So you're telling your partner, listen, I really need the time for myself, because otherwise it's really hard to survive being a mother of young children, even teenagers. You know, we get lost in being a mom, a parent, a wife, a partner, even a daughter. And we forget who we are. And the more you neglect your self-care or what you want to do, it's gonna be harder and harder to do it, right? You just kind of you see there's a term that's being tossed around a lot called self-abandonment. You start to abandon yourself and what you want to do. So creating those boundaries or creating, you know, with others and carving out time and your schedule on a regular basis, even once a week for coffee with your friends, is really important. And it may not be easy, but I think once you do it, you'll see all the benefits you'll get from it. It could be just like even taking a bath and saying, Listen, I'm gonna go take a bath, or just go in the bathroom and you know, hang out for a while in that sacred space. I I encourage all women to find a place that they can go to, even in their home where they're undisturbed, even for 10 minutes, close their eyes, uh, hold a crystal to have a cup of tea. It's so important that you have time for yourself so that you say you gain that respect for yourself and also others. You're telling others to respect you by honoring your time.

SPEAKER_00 14:46

I can remember working in corporate and getting to a point one day where the phone was ringing. The emails wouldn't stay, and just everyone wanted a piece of me. And I actually went to the bathroom and just sat on the toilet. I didn't need to go to the toilet to use the bathroom. I just couldn't take anymore.

SPEAKER_01 15:04

I just had to sit and get away from the they'll find you in there too. No, just but you know where I'm I find and I I know we did a little video about this the other day. It's like my car. Sometimes when I'm in my car, it's like my space, you know, like you're driving even and you go for a ride and you're by yourself and you have your music and you can sing loudly and no one can get to you. Turn off your phone. I love that. Like your car could be your sanctuary, even.

SPEAKER_00 15:32

Absolutely. Just that moment away. Just that moment. And little habits build, like you were saying before, that first door, take that first step.

SPEAKER_01 15:43

And don't feel guilty.

SPEAKER_00 15:45

Yeah, don't feel guilty. And the other thing um I like that you talk about too, Rose, is that suppressing anger and it gets stored in our body. Because when we if we go on from where we've just been talking about on to the next step, if we don't do it, what's the what's the outcome?

SPEAKER_01 16:02

Yeah, I just had a conversation with someone the other day, and she was talking to me, and you can tell she had a lot of anger, and she's going to a psychiatrist, and I said, Well, what do you talk to about your psychiatrist? What is your what does she say? She goes, Oh, she says, I'm so composed, going through all these things in my life that I'm going through. I says, She says you're composed, but you're talking to me right now, and you're so angry. I says, You need to learn how to manage that anger. You're it's you should never suppress your anger. You should find a healthy way to um express it. And it could mean a sport or even taking a uh boxing class or punching a pillow or journaling about it. But yes, anger is um it can be very powerful uh in a way that'll it'll um it'll hurt you physically and emotionally.

SPEAKER_00 16:56

Yes, I agree. Um so if we layer up on that, Rose, I also see that you gave up drinking alcohol about two years ago.

SPEAKER_01 17:08

Yes, two and a half years ago.

SPEAKER_00 17:10

Yeah, um, and you mentioned that you believe that you were using it for maybe not the right word is coping, but you you gave it away. And tell us a bit about that. Like tell pe tell us and you know, the audience that are listening that you know what giving up alcohol meant for you and did for you.

SPEAKER_01 17:34

Sure. So, I mean, for me, drinking was social. Uh, you know, getting together with friends or mostly and then drinking every night or most of the time during dinner because we loved our wine. I grew up with an Italian family. We may even made our own wine, but then it became a habit, right? Starting to cook, I wanted a glass of wine. And then I realized that my body wasn't responding well anymore. I had already can't I had had cancer already. I didn't want cancer again. My father died from uh cancer as well, that was related to smoking and drinking, the doctor said. Um, and it just wasn't making me feel good. I didn't like waking up in the middle of the night, sweating, and then the next day beat myself up over it. So I started to um write about it. That's how I started. I said started to write about it, and then I started to ask for guidance on how to stop it. Uh, I used Chigong also to help me um manage that uh those emotions around it and a lot of reiki and a lot of prayers, and also um yeah, so then I stopped. I just stopped drinking just like that. And it's been two and a half years, and I feel amazing. I haven't, you know, lost any weight, but that's okay. I feel good, I sleep much better, I don't have a desire for it, and I'm a clearer channel for it as well. So I am more in tune to like higher guidance or higher source for when I do my energy work as well. So it's been really helpful and I love it. And I know that there's a almost like a trend that people are experimenting or are sober curious, and I think that's fantastic because I also want to be a good example for my kids.

SPEAKER_00 19:27

What did you call it? Sober curious.

SPEAKER_01 19:29

Yeah. I like sober curious, yeah. Look, yeah, it's another term I've heard used uh many times for people that you know they want to stop drinking for 30 days and see how they feel. Um yeah, there's a whole trend on people drinking less now.

SPEAKER_00 19:50

I'm curious to now ask it, no, Rose, if you felt like a drink, would you take one? Would you have one? Or you just now?

SPEAKER_01 19:58

Yeah, now don't have any urge. I I don't um I don't feel I need to have one. Uh I don't miss it. Uh the biggest thing, the biggest concern that I had, or I should say fear again, was being judged by others um in a an environment where everyone else was drinking. And then like, you know, maybe not be accepted. So but that didn't make I didn't worry about that long. I let that go.

SPEAKER_00 20:30

Yeah, that's great. And Rose, you do things differently, I've noticed. Um you had your twins later in life. You do was that a conscious choice that you did that or so I met my husband later.

SPEAKER_01 20:47

Yeah, so I so I had been married once before when I was younger. Not yeah, I guess right after my mom passed away, I I got married. That didn't last long, that was two years, and so uh then I was single on my own for a long time and met my husband uh when I was around that 38, and then we got married at 40, and I had my children at 41. But I always knew I was gonna have twins. It was one of those feelings that I had, and I had them naturally, they run in my family, and so I always said God's you know saving me to have twins, and I was right. So I almost feel like m manifested them as well. So yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:28

Yeah. So for the woman that out there that might be getting some pressure that you know, your clock's chiming away, you're ticking away, you're leaving it too late. What what advice would you have for the woman that um out there that is listening now with her glass of wine that she might be, you know, it's wine o'clock for her. Um and you see we we seem to have this societal pressure you get married when you're having a baby. When you have a baby, when you're having a baby, you're going to need assistance. You didn't.

SPEAKER_01 22:00

I did not. Yeah. Yeah. I knew. I knew I was gonna, I was gonna have uh I knew I was gonna have twins. Um, and I did, but you know, it's a choice, it's it's a hard one. It that you society does put a lot of pressure on women, and then a lot of women can't. There's a lot of fertility issues, and that stems back a lot to you know, your energy is maybe imbalanced. And I was talking about that energy in our bodies, you know, a lot of acupunctures now being used to help women conceive. Um, so that's a tough one, but you know, having being motherhood is a is a personal journey, and you know, if you want to have kids, and hopefully you can have kids, but it's not easy raising children at any age. 41 was hard, but I did it. And um yeah, it was it was great. That was my midlife, that was entry into my midlife having having twins. And it's keep me young.

SPEAKER_00 22:58

It's an individual choice, and I think there's too much pressure out there that you've been married two years, why don't you have a baby?

SPEAKER_01 23:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 23:06

Maybe I don't want one just yet.

SPEAKER_01 23:09

A lot of people um I think there's a trend. This was years ago I heard this that less and less people are having children. You know. But who knows? That could change.

SPEAKER_00 23:22

I don't yes, in my like I can my I got married when I was 29, and that was quite late in terms of what was happening in Australia then. Um, and I see a lot now of girls like 19, they've gone it's gone back that way a little bit on that curve, like our grandmothers, 18, 19. I'm thinking, whoa, they haven't lived, they haven't traveled, but they're happy.

SPEAKER_01 23:46

If they're happy, yes, they find someone uh that they love instead of the I think the dating scene. If I had to do that again, that would be difficult. I don't know. I think I think at this point I would say, I'm good by myself, thank you. I don't want to take care of anybody else, no, no other man, I'm good.

SPEAKER_00 24:05

Absolutely, it's a bit difficult, isn't it?

SPEAKER_01 24:08

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:09

Yeah, yeah. Um, that's like looking, well, yeah, sometimes it's like looking for a needle in a haste.

SPEAKER_01 24:16

I did it for a little while myself and I just oh but for women, I think we need to take we need to really return to the self. We need to take care of ourselves and kind of master, not master, but like just enjoy our life, enjoy who we are, get to know ourselves. Right? We've we don't get a chance to pause and say, okay, you know, who's Rose? What does Rose want to do today? What is Rose like today? Why, how has she changed? Like we change, but we don't get a chance to really um, you know, have a relationship with ourselves. And I think that's important.

SPEAKER_00 24:56

Yeah, we don't get to embrace who we are, do we?

SPEAKER_01 24:58

No, no, we're too busy doing for others.

SPEAKER_00 25:02

And the other thing um I like that you have mentioned, Rose, is about no longer feeling or being invisible.

SPEAKER_01 25:11

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 25:12

And that goes along with with what you were just saying there, that I think that forms part of knowing thyself. As you, you know, I know as a daughter, a you know, um as a sister, as whatever you may be on the day, you can just get lost in in that in that role.

SPEAKER_01 25:35

In that role, yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_00 25:37

In that hat that you might have on in that moment. You know, who am I in this moment? And and the other uh one, the other really good one I've learned now is no is a full sentence. It used to be no because um I have to go and do this for because um um and it was like a three minute, yeah. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 25:54

It's just no, it's just no, no explanations, and that's it. Yeah, yeah. I think we that's a hard one. And also the I'm sorry one where we say I'm sorry. I know I do too. I'm like, darn it, why did I say that? It's like, oh, I should be, I don't know, um tapped on the head every time that happens. But yeah, no and sorry. Those like you know, say no more often and say sorry less. Maybe we should create a slogan.

SPEAKER_00 26:22

Yeah, absolutely. Um, I tend not to say I'm sorry anymore. I just use the word apologies. Oh, apologies for that. To me, that doesn't feel so soul destroying. So when I like you were just saying, if I say sorry for something I haven't done, that really messes with my um with my mind and my soul, and I go, well, I didn't do anything wrong, but why am I saying so? And then I analyze it for too long. So if I just use the word apologies, that's short, brief, and um I can kind of feel okay with using that word.

SPEAKER_01 26:56

Yeah, because you're not really directing it to yourself by saying apologies where you're saying I am it's more like, yeah, that's good enough. Oh apologies for that. I've taken that one. You can take it.

SPEAKER_00 27:09

All right. You can have it. You can have it. I love it.

SPEAKER_01 27:11

Thank you, thank you, thank you. Life-changing.

SPEAKER_00 27:15

All right, everybody out there, did you hear that? I actually um worked with a client a long time ago and I had an S jar. You know how some people have a swear jar that I was I wanted to do an S jar for that person because every time that person said sorry, it was just so much in their in their vocabulary. Sorry, or sorry for that, or sorry for that, or sorry for that. I wanted a jar where they put the money in every time they use the S word. There was no more S word. Sorry, it's apologies, apologies, apologies.

SPEAKER_01 27:45

I'm gonna use that too, and then at the end of the year, I probably have a lot of money in that jar, but I'm gonna I'm gonna try both, see which works.

SPEAKER_00 27:55

All right, Rose. As we wrap up today, is there anything you else you'd like to add? This has been amazing to I loved it.

SPEAKER_01 28:02

Well, I just want to say thank you for inviting me on the show, and thank you for the work that you're doing. Congratulations that you you have your books, right? Thank you. And you, yes, thank you. Yeah, my book, Emperor Empress Rising, Owned Your Energy. I love it. Yeah, thank you. I it was a lot of work, and I I love it. I love that I wrote it. It was a dream of mine to write, and it just one day it just kind of came through. I wrote it down on paper and worked on it. Um, so I'm really excited about that. And you know, if anybody wants to reach out, they can find me at rosewhipage.com and my podcast, Chat Off the Mat. I would love to have you on as well, Lara.

SPEAKER_00 28:39

Yes, yes, I will pop up. I was going to say suggest that I'll be on your show. All right, lovely. I'll um yes. So congratulations to you, Rose, on an amazing book. It's because it's a work, it's like birthing. Yeah, umgratulations. Okay. Uh, I can't wait to be on your podcast. And that's how we rock and roll, women that help each other out. It's that sisterhood. It's kind of that kitchen table that we no longer have. I can remember my grandmother sitting around peeling the vegetables with the lady next door and having a coffee or whatever else they had a sip of in the day. Um and um it's no longer there. So this is our version in today's society, what Rose and I are doing. So find someone that you can do that with too. Lovely people. Okay, so this has been another episode of Midlife Unplugged the Fucker Ears. I'm your host, Lara Portelli, and thank you again, Rose.

SPEAKER_01 29:36

Thank you, Lara. So great to be here.

SPEAKER_00 29:38

Thank you. After that, on this episode of Midlife Unplugged. If today's conversation is something fucking new, please subscribe, share it with your midlife crew, and keep the conversation going. I'm Lara Portelli. See you next week for another four video and apologetic.